miss cathy

i know i haven been blogging lately
is kinda like the last thing on my mind now
things haven been goin as well as i hope
work stress is on an all time high
huge responsibility
low pay
family wise
as usual
i'm invisible
until there's a problem
I AM TOTALLY INVISIBLE
my feelings don matter
i don have a say in anything
so after a while i just give up
i stop talking
stop suggesting
noone's listening anyway...
no point
is like things just kept happening like waves
it nvr stops
was worrying abt mel
thank god he's ok now
then family situation
then the passing of a friend
then another friend
add up my workload
stress
endless worry of my financial situation

I'm really really tired
really really burn out
everytime i get upset
all these problems will hit me like waves
again again and again
i really don know how long i can take this
wat makes it worse
i live on the freaking 19 th floor
i know i wont do anything stupid
cause the logical side of me is still quite strong
i really really want to be able to cope
but i cant
i donno why
i just wanna run away
is like being push and push into a corner
and u cant dig your way out
you tried so hard to push back to dig
and now
u're just tired
there is so much against me rite now
and i'm tired
so so tired