just finish typing my 1 mth notice
is a great feeling
never felt better
today work was good
most of the time i was left out
which is good in a sense
i don get scolded and stuff
i am now 150% sure that weiling is out to get me
she changed her work timetable
ALL SAME SHIFT AS ME
torture me for 1 last mth
wonder who will she torture next

i typed my notice with my fingers crossed
cause i lied

" Thank you for making my work experience in Kinokuniya a wonderful and meaningful one. Hope you understand that my decision is made upon careful consideration and I apologise for any inconvenience caused. "

1. i don wanna thank them

2. my experience was anything but meaningful and wonderful

3. there was NO consideration AT ALL when i was deciding i knew i want OUT

4. and i DON apologise for anything i cause u should apologise to me for making my life hell

mua hahahahahahaha
now counting the days
1 mth is abit too long
other CO
i week 2 weeks
1 mth
gosh

got a hair cut again
shorter
but nicer
hopefully
easier to manage
haiz

30 days and counting
wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

the events that happened these few days
makes me feel sad for this society
is all abt looks
body boobs butt

all these guys are looking for a hot gal
hot= skinny
even if they don meet up the GUY standands is ok
the gal must meet up with theirs

i'll admit i like cute guys
hot bod
6-8 packs
tan
hothothot
but i don expect my bf to look that way

i know how i look
i go for guys who r like me
which is getting lesser since the guys my type
r getting more and more shameless
going for the perfect 10 gal

don they get it
perfect 10 gals only go for perfect 10 guys
who wants to look so pretty and then spoilt everything
by going for a not so perfect guy
WAKE UP AND SMELL REALITY
U'RE NOT THAT GOOD LOOKING
WHY R U LOOKING FOR A PERFECT HOT GF

i know there will be my time
i'll find someone who loves me for who i am
just take right now i have to endure with all this

if i cant do that
i'll just move to kansas
the city with the higest obese rate

:P

wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
changed my blog skin
is jimmy's comic
so cute
like the things he draw

anyway
I"VE DECIDED TO QUIT
YES
since the job at kino
kills me
why cont
doing things i hate
working like hell
while the seniors relax
and all
NO WAY
i quit

found another job
events management
WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
better pay than kino
pretty working hours
hopefully better ppl

haha

my week

is pretty sad
i know
is always sad
depress

firstly is abt my weight and all
my size
blah

then is work
to tell u the truth
i hate it
i'm only there for the money
cookie left
francis is leaving
on sat
i wasnt on the same shift as sue
so spend my breaks and all with the others
SENIORS
who r hostile to me
pretty upset
the way they are against newbies
push all th ejobs to us
while they stand there and talk
donno wat to do with it

then today
is my sis
i really donno what to say abt her
if she wants to borrow anything from me
i'll lend
till to the point she don even ask
just take
my lip gloss
nail polish
blah
but then when i wanna use her things
NONONO
every expensive
she said
COME ON LAH CHEAPO
my 1 lip gloss is MORE ex than ur fucking mask

and my mom
GOSH
when i don wanna lend them
she scold me
said why i'm so selfish
must lend them

my sis nvr lend me
she FUCKING nvr say anything
don know what wrong with her
she nvr scolds them for not halping
while i slave away
AND SHE SAY I DON HELP
sick of them

which come back to my point
i wanna MOVE AWAY
get away frm all this shit

kansas sounds good
hahaha
they have the highest obese rate
in the states
i can blend rite in
i might even look thin
hahahaha

kindna miss him again
i know i know
i cant
is over
but just that these few days when i'm sad
i miss having him
to cuss with me
cuss the ppl and made me sad
in a funny way
till i laugh
miss miss miss

ok
got over it
all of these
off my chest
feeling better already
wheeeeeeeeeeeeee

i can hardly wait

was in the train today
sitting opp 2 really skinny gal
they were talking abt sizes
and in a way i can feel they r making fun of me
and my size

sure i must admit i'm alittle overweight and all
but to under go this treatment frm them
is not easy
to be me

yes i've seen ppl who r waaayyyy fatter than me
i know i'm really not that fat
but how can i escape the looks of sporeans
who believe that thin is everything
even my mom believes that

one of my friend recently told me
that this place kills her self esteem
she like me
has alot of confidence

but the looks of this place kills it
everytime i get this little bit of self esteem
someone has to come and KILL it

they have to put me down
give me looks like i have another head
i grew up being different

i was different frm my pri cls mates
i was loud and different
sec sch
i was different too

now
ppl don look at me the same way cause i'm fat

same thing happened to me again and again
i cant go out with any of my bfs without ppl saying
how did fat gal get a bf

i had some guy screaming
hey fat gal
once at me

i pick myself up again and again and again
the minute i get my self esteem back
someone have to push me down

ppl i don know
my mom
family members
friends

u're fat
u need to lose weight
u have to exercise
u can use this use that

i lost count of how many ppl
made fun of my weight

lost count of how many guy rejected me
because of my weight

i was called cute
= ugly but still ok

wat guys want
is a gal
with a totally hot body
stuff for wet dreams

well i'm not
i might nvr be
but can this place accept me the way i am

i don think so
i remember when i was young
when i wanted to get the hell of here
my sis asked me
why do u wanna leave spore

y???

because this place will nvr accept me the way i am
big bone
unable to lose weight me
everyguy is looking for a thin gal

no gals will accept me into their perfect thin world
i accept the way this society is
i wouldnt change it
i'll run away frm it

even my mom ask me to lose weight
my family don even accept me
all of them like the other normal sporeans are thin

i stood out like a sore thumb
like i always do
i don want to

i want to leave
leave this superficia place
asap

i cant wait to grow older
work
hopefully in a MNC
which can transfer me to other countries
i'm sick of this place

i can hardly wait

ARGH

i work like hell
endure the customers / co-worker's
BULL SHIT
to earn

$270 PER MTH

am so fucked up rite now
barely enough to cover my transport / food
i cant buy clothes
have to cut down my wish list

SHIT

and i have to save for my KL trip and my root canal

COME ON
WITH 200 AND FUCKING 70
SHIT

have to buy new year clothes too

am barely surviving

plus my parents think i'm rich

like i have enough money
alot of money
but i'm always broke

know why i'm broke

cause i earn so fucking little
for working like fucking hell
fucking CPF
the main reson my pay is so little

is not as if i'm gonna live in spore in the future

the 1st chance i get
i'm getting the shit hell outta here
why in the fucking world will i need fucking CPF
i don even wanna live here when i'm older
when i need CPF

argghhh

just piss rite now

which is why i'm using lots of profanity
cant help it
FUCKING STUPID KINO
MAKE US WORK SO HARD
EARN SO LITTLE
PAY SENIORS SO MUCH
FOR WHAT
STAND AROUND AND TALK
PRETEND TO BE BUSY
ASS

my week

mua hahahahahahaha
a brand new year
a brand new start
work was ok
pretty boring on sat
cookie left already
francis got a hangover and couldnt come
sooooo bored
but i saw Sly
okok
not bad
looks better in person
but then got scolded by limin
for not telling her he was here
hehehe
sowwy gal
hehe

then sch starts
hahaha
our new sch looks like a hospital in a horror movie
forget abt using old changi hospital as a filming set
use our sch instead
classes are ok
wed biz law night class
hahahahahahaha
cause afternoon no space for me
all adults
gosh
all so serious
but is good
i can concentrate more
heehehehehehehehe

quote of the day

Don't take life too serious. You'll never escape it alive anyway.

Elbert Hubbard

some quotes

In your life, you meet people. Some you never think about again. Some, you wonder what happened to them. There are some that you wonder if they ever think about you. And then there are some you wish you never had to think about again. But you do.


You know what's wrong with you...You're chicken. You're afraid to stick out your chin and say, 'Okay, life's a fact.' People DO fall in love. People do belong to each other. Because that's the only chance anybody's got for real happiness. You call yourself a free spirit, a wild thing, yet you're terrified that somebody's gonna put you in a cage. Well, baby, you're already in a cage and you built it yourself. And it's not bound on the east by Somali Land or on the west by Tulip, Texas. It's everywhere you go. Because no matter where you run, you're always going to end up running into yourself.

Breakfast at Tiffany's


That is just what I am, a maniac. All the greatest men are maniacs. They are possessed by a mania which drives them forwards towards their goal. The great scientists, the philosophers, the religious leaders-all maniacs"

Ian Flemming, Doctor No


Whenever I get gloomy with the state of the world, I think about the arrivals gate at Heathrow Airport. General opinion's starting to make out that we live in a world of hatred and greed, but I don't see that. It seems to me that love is everywhere. Often it's not particularly dignified or newsworthy, but it's always there - fathers and sons, mothers and daughters, husbands and wives, boyfriends, girlfriends, old friends. When the planes hit the Twin Towers, as far as I know none of the phone calls from the people on board were messages of hate or revenge - they were all messages of love. If you look for it, I've got a sneaky feeling you'll find that love actually is all around.

Love Actually


How many lives do we live? How many times do we die? They say we all lose 21 grams... at the exact moment of our death. Everyone. And how much fits into 21 grams? How much is lost? When do we lose 21 grams? How much goes with them? How much is gained? How much is gained? Twenty-one grams. The weight of a stack of five nickels. The weight of a hummingbird. A chocolate bar. How much did 21 grams weigh?

Paul Rivers, 21 Grams


The hardest part of life is finding out that not everyone wishes you well.


If TV is so bad for you, then why do they have them in every hospital bedroom?

S. Mueller


San Francisco in the middle sixties was a very special time and place to be a part of. Maybe it meant something. Maybe not, in the long run, but no explanation, no mix of words or music or memories can touch that sense of knowing that you were there and alive in that corner of time and the world. Whatever it meant. There was madness in any direction, at any hour. If not across the Bay, then up the Golden Gate or down 101 to Los Altos or La Honda. You could strike sparks anywhere. There was a fantastic universal sense that whatever we were doing was right, that we were winning. And that, I think, was the handle - that sense of inevitable victory over the forces of Old and Evil. Not in any mean or military sense; we didn't need that. Our energy would simply prevail. There was no point in fighting - on our side or theirs. We had all the momentum; we were riding the crest of a high and beautiful wave. So now, less than five years later, you can go up on a steep hill in Las Vegas and look West, and with the right kind of eyes you can almost see the high-water mark - the place where the wave finally broke and rolled back.

Raoul Duke, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas


While I thought that I was learning how to live, I have been learning how to die.

Leonardo da Vinci


If Dracula can't see his reflection in a mirror, how come his hair is always so neatly combed?

Steven Wright


The moral sense reappears today with the same morning newness that has been from of old the fountain of beauty and strength. You say there is no religion now. 'Tis like saying in rainy weather, There is no sun, when at that moment we are witnessing one of its superlative effects.

Ralph Waldo Emerson


I think vegetarians have it all wrong, whats this about being kind to animals, and then stealing their food behind their backs so they can starve to death...


There are no monuments dedicated to me and my name will soon be forgotten, but I have loved another with all my heart and soul, and to me this has always been enough.

Nicholas Sparks - The Notebook


"Never wrestle with a pig, you get dirty; and besides, the pig likes it."

George Bernard Shaw